Yoga Girl.
Yes, I am a Yoga girl. I found Yoga (or maybe it found me) during my Sophomore year of college. I remember it clearly. It was during the time of final exams and the health center offered Hatha Yoga classes in the Blue Room (don’t know why it was called that, because the walls aren’t blue), adjacent to the cafeteria, and nestled between two residential halls. The class intrigued me. I knew that it would be so wonderful to take a break from studying for final exams and just relax. So I went to the class, and fell in love. The best part was the instructor gave each student a mini foot massage at the end of class. Love it!
My intention for practicing Yoga is for balance and strength. Even though I am a Yoga girl, who sometimes (lately) lives at the Yoga studio, it’s so much more than what I expected. But I’ve decided something so important that I must confess. For me, trying to practice five times a week is just not about how many times I practice. It’s about the ideal of letting go of all imperfections and finding that balance and strength within myself.
Just letting go. That’s what it all about. Not about practicing five times a week.
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Enjoy the Ride.
I love to flow from one class to another. To feel like I’m getting somewhere. This class was all about holding each pose, not a series of poses, just individual poses, for longer periods of time. When I say “longer” I’m talking five minutes of holding each pose. For me, I can be very impatient at times and kept looking at my watch and thinking “is it over yet?”.
It was good to try a different style, but I won’t be going back to this class.
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Yoga Challenge.
Today I went to my first Vinyasa class. It’s very different being in class than practicing at home. It was great that today our instructor (also the owner), Mary Ellen, gave us the choice of what music we wanted to listen to. Personally, the kind of music you listen to during a class (or none at all) really impacts the practice. Our choice of music was “happy” and I thought it was cool to practice to The Beatles and various other artists.
However, on a positive note (as if talking about Yoga isn’t positive) I have decided to embark on my Yoga studio’s 8-week Yoga Challenge program. The 8-week program consists of taking five Yoga classes over the course of one week for eight weeks. So far, I’ve got two classes down and I’ve scheduled three more classes in, potentially four until my “week” is over ending on Monday. Also, I must say… that within each practice I feel myself getting stronger and stronger. It’s just incredible and I can’t imagine what kind of change will happen the more I practice.
Love it.
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Running Groove.
Running. Sometimes I don’t feel so strong. Sometimes I tend to doubt myself too much pre-run and once I get out there, I can’t move. It’s almost like “hello, legs… what are you doing?”. I can’t move. Because I’ve done so much talking down to myself that I almost think I can’t run. I hate to say it, but this happens a lot.
I haven’t had a confident run in awhile. A run where I feel like I own the pavement. Or that the pavement, tries to own me but I show it who’s boss. That’s right, I’m the boss! The best runs for me are the quick and dirty variety, the kind where I’ve got something, some stress related fury inside of me that I want to burn off. Those are the best. As much as I hate stress, I want to have a powerful quick and dirty run in the upcoming days. This isn’t to say I want something bad to happen (this sort of thing gets me going to the point where I perform very, very well better than non-pissy days) just so I can perform better.
Sometimes it works. It’s just the groove of running.
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Perfectly OK.
I walked into my local Yoga studio with the happiest grin on my face. I could finally, be at peace with the emotions of being unemployed, and the emotions of my car situation and let it go. I chit chatted with the owner of the studio for a bit, chatting about my Yoga practice, my wonderful Yoga DVD that I swear by, Power Yoga for Happiness 2, and amongst other things. I chatted with her for a few minutes, and entered the studio.
A warm setting, one that I’m not used to, but it felt all too familiar. The first time I took a Hot Yoga class, I was in a place of mental fuzziness, one that I don’t want to revisit. A place where I was so unhealthy due to my Eating Disorder, and of course I did anything then to sweat, sweat sweat! However, today’s practice was all about balance. Trying to seek balance in my Yoga practice but in other areas of health and fitness.
During the practice, I felt challenged. Challenged in a good way that I haven’t felt before. In some of my Yoga practices, I had trouble focusing, trouble keeping centered, which made it hard to just practice. But today felt different. That I was just able to focus on my breath. Focus on me. Not everything else that is going on in this crazy world, and my life as I know it.
At the end of practice, I felt so cleansed. So clean inside. Mentally and physically. Yes, I sweated a lot, but sweating during this practice wasn’t the point. During some of the poses (and I didn’t let the instructor see this), I felt myself tearing up inside. Because I was able to push myself, gently… more than I ever have before during any practice, and the feeling of being OK that I’m not perfect and that’s perfectly OK. Sometimes, I tried to outdo myself, pushing myself beyond what I was truly capable of at the moment, like Tree Pose. I tried, I really did… and for a second there, I told myself “it’s just not my time”, and moved on.
It’s perfectly OK not to be perfect.
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Training
